Schlocolate!
Karl Lagerfeld and his chocolate lapdog
It’s not as if Krazy Karl ever, you know, eats (or at least he doesn’t swallow), but he has designed an all-chocolate hotel room, including a solid chocolate (and apparently quite startled) roommate modeled on his own pet, Baptiste Giabiconi. He’s a pretty fellow, but really is a pity about the melasma. Still, I would recommend not just a condom but a full-body wetsuit if you’re going to get down and dirty with Blackface Boy here.
I feel like I’ve crossed a line just having seen that. It is something I want to un-know.
This is definitely an outtake from the kind of porn I don’t even want to know exists. Somewhere just out of shot there’s a white unicorn that’s about to be deflowered, I just know it.